We kick off this issue with a drag bike style BSA A50 called 'Dusen' and it is super sweet! 'Dusen' is a German word that means: 'Get out of my way you nonce I'm coming through really fast and I got no brakes.'
How quaint!

Ok, you love the look of an old bike but you want the performance and reliability of a new bike. I feel the same way about music, I love the old stuff but sometimes it doesn't hurt to rock it up a little. Saying that, sometimes that doesn't even work. E.g. The new direction Jessica Simpson is taking right now to country music, what is she thinking?! Total rubbish.

Collecting Cadillac speed equipment is a disease! I should know! I have all kinds of killer stuff! Rare valve covers, intakes, weird valley pans etc…oh, and only one Caddy engine. That doesn't run. What an idiot. Maybe I should have done what Piero did and focus on actually putting a killer car on the road. Dang.!

Jeannine rules it big time on her Triton and in the word's of Devo…
'She's just the girl, she's just the girl,
The girl u want,
She's just the girl, she's just the girl,
The girl u want.'

About 6 months ago me and my friend dropped 2 hits each of this acid called 'The Rose'. We were staying with friends who had Pink Floyd's movie 'The Wall', which I had never seen before so I was looking forward to the whole thing. But after about 30 minutes I experienced something I have never experienced before! Everything in the room was changing colours, spinning around like crazy and the ceiling had screaming faces swirling across it! I was tripping balls hard! The strangest part of the Trip was the feeling inside my head. It was as if my entire thinking process was wiped out. I could barely remember my name and nothing made sense to me at all. My hearing seemed to be as distorted as much as my sight. All the sounds I heard were not distinct sounds but a blur of multiple sounds colliding with one another. After the movie (which was awesome!) we went for a rather interesting walk around the neighborhood. We began to come down. After 8 hours it was over.
Big Scott's Trippy Shovel.

In England young Chavs are running rampant and riding on the busses for free and hurling abuse at people. When they are not on the bus they are hanging around their local park listening to music on their mobiles or riding in packs on little scooters! Basically they are just causing all kinds of ASBO! Not only that but they also have their own slang talk which is brilliant. The last time I was in London I walked past a couple of young Chavs who were loitering outside McDonalds, this is what I got from the conversation.
Chav 1: Yes mate! Maccy D's is wicked innit!
Chav 2: Yeah but dat bloke who served us looked a bit mongish innit.
Chav 1: Yes mate!

Have you ever seen such a nice motorcycle in all your life? Mattias in Sweden is the proud owner and he is lucky enough to ride this thing around! You have heard of a Pan bottom shovel top right? Well this is a Shovel bottom and Pan top! Booyah!

The TV show 'Full House' from the '90's was absolute shite and as we all know it debuted 2 little weirdo's that are the Olson twins. They really do look like Owls huh?! Gross.

Duane Ballard has been known to make a seat or 2 in his time and now he actually got to do one for his own bike! Digger style Honda's are where it's at brother!
Pics: Josh Kurpius

Johnny Morales is a good mate of ours and he has motorcycles to die for. This is his new (?)…nearly finished (?)…Shovelhead! Hopefully next time I see it, it will be running (?)…

Have you ever noticed in every great rock n roll song that all the major partying happens…'On a Saturday night.' Well that's because it's the best night of the week to rock out for one, plus there are way more chicks out and most importantly, the local juke joint is awful on a Sunday night! I blame the DJ who works that night he plays way too much trancey stuff and not enough off that good hard drum n bass.
This issue's style bible…Sideburns.

Pan Ed follows in his Father's footsteps and builds this wicked, stripped down Panhead that he got from an old greybeard with crazy stories!

The first time I met my mate Ruddy was a couple of years back at the Smokeout West in Arizona. We drank, we sang, we danced the night away and then we then got into a massive fight with a bunch of Jocks! I say 'we'…I wasn't actually there at that point because I went to bed, but if I were, I would killed all of them!
photo: Jeramiah Arminta

The last thing I want to do when I have a major hangover is get on 'The Heart Breaker' and ride hundreds of miles. What I do want to do is put on my pj's, cuddle up on the sofa with 'monkey pillow' and watch a marathon of 'The Dog Whisperer.' The guys who take part in 'Pancho Drink The Wine' are complete nutters.

I read in the Sun the other day that Jade Goody is not well. To say that Matt Davis loves her is the understatement of the century! He has been in love with that pug-nosed-gimp-faced-fat-cow since day one! I don't really like her so all I can say is, get well pig face. Mark Trawler's Bone Shakin' Evo Sportster is the shit.

Yone Baloney Macaroni from 'Bull Original' is responsible for this mental Pan. Motorshop frame, Crazy 5 spoke mags and a Harley front fender mounted on the back! I reckon in the future you will be able to buy a 'Pan in a can'…you open it and a hologram of a killer Panhead appears right? Then you put your special helmet on and…Wooosh! You ride into the make believe sunset. Awesome! What about a 'Knuckle in a Buckle'?! You take your belt off right?...

Twatification.